it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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