I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
