going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
