omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
