So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
