white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
