I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
