so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
