They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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