Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
