Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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