Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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