Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
there is puke in my bra ... again
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
