Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
