Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
