Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
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