They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
