anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
