i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Randomize
