i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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