i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize
