Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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