So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Randomize
