If i come over, it means nothing
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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