you guys were way drunker than both of me
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
