have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
