His pubic hair was longer than his dick
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
