did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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