we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
