good thing vaginas are great cup holders
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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