I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
