i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
