Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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