Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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