i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
