I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize