It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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