there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
