Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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