that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Just cropdusted the office
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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