these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
