i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
