I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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