im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Randomize
