hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
