and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize
