Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
