Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
