please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
