Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
